Little Learnings

I just had a special moment, and it made an impression on me how the little events that occur in life often have significance and hold meaning for the larger picture...anyway, I recently moved to my own apartment, and as a result have been doing tons of furniture shopping. I bought a great shelf today at Crate and Barrel, but did not realize that their flat packing is not as great as Ikea's, meaning, the box the shelf came in was huge, and seemingly totally unmanageable by one person. So, as the C&B folks struggled to force the humongous rectangular heavy box into my small Kia Sephia, I wondered how on earth I was going to get the thing out of my car and into my place on the 3rd floor...

My parents are busy tonight going to some dinner party, so I couldn't ask them; my one buddy who helps me with absolutely everything already turned his phone off for the night (he goes to bed really early since he's a construction worker); another guy I talk to who is kind of flaky ended up doing the flaky thing...but I can't be mad cause he lives a good 40 minutes from my house (and I didn't even tell him he was going to help me with the bookcase flat out, sigh.) The only other guy who lived near enough to help me is someone that probably likes me more than I like him, and I didn't want to lead him on if I'm not interested, or be trifiling and essentially use him.

I went into the house and started pondering...is this what life is like alone? No one to help you with those little things? What if I end up never finding a great guy to spend time with, I'll never have anyone to be there for me in times of need. Is it possible to be happy, or even self sufficient, alone? Mind you, these are questions coming from one self-sufficient, independent woman who works out regularly and usually thinks she can so absolutley anything. But I was doubtful...

Finally, I got myself up and went back down to my car and decided I had to at least attempt to bring the damn thing up myself. Me and the handtruck, I mean. Well, guess what. The bookcase was heavy as hell, I nearly crushed my hand at one point, and I even turned down the help of a stranger who saw me struggling...but I did it. I dragged the case out of the left hand side of the passenger and backseats it had taken over, somehow managed to lever it onto the hand truck, and rolled it precariously through 3 doors and in and out of an elevator all the way up to my home..I did it!

Moral of the story: yes, sometimes things are easier, life is better with someone there to give you a hand...but it is possible to succeed alone! I managed, all by myself, I'm going to put the damn thing together, all by myself, and I'm not going to be sad and/or depressed because I'm all by myself. I feel empowered because I don't feel like I need to not be alone; yes, things might be better...but I can manage with just me.